Karen from HR vs Payroll: The Offsite with Trust Falls

No one fell. But several almost walked.

Karen booked an offsite.
Theme: “Building Resilience Through Connection.”
The venue: a converted barn with motivational posters and no Wi-Fi.
She called it “a digital detox.”

We called it “a trap.”

Upon arrival, Karen handed out colour-coded name badges.
Each badge had a “personality word.”
Mine said "Steady."
Bob’s said "Sunbeam."
No one knows why.

The agenda included:

• 9:00 AM: “Payroll Speed-Dating”

• 10:15 AM: “Feelings Mapping”

• 11:30 AM: Trust Falls

Lunch: Organic quinoa wraps and infused cucumber water.

We asked about coffee.
There was no coffee.

During the trust falls, Tom from Finance refused to catch anyone.
He said, “I don't believe in unverified liabilities.”
Karen clapped and called it “an opportunity for honest dialogue.”

The final activity was writing haikus about our payroll journey.
Steve from IT’s entry:

Payroll confuses
So many mysterious tabs
Please just pay me right

We applauded.
Karen cried.

Winner: unclear.
But I now have a reusable name badge that says “Steady.”
It’s not wrong.